Life is so hard -- don't you ever just want to give up?
Life is so hard -- don't you ever just want to give up?
Isn't advertising soap as "anti-bacterial" a little redundant?
The great thing about Americans is that when they get fat, they get really frickin' fat.
They say obesity is a virus, but you're not going to have warn your exes that you've become fat.
I found the golden ticket in my onion rings!
You don't think God sees all the stuff you do?
Can you imagine if I had ketchup bottles for legs?
Applebee's gives its waiters pins after they stay for two years.
All my friends are good looking.
Lasik surgery can cost $295 per eye.
