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Afternoon advertising is true evil.
People think I'm gay.
I found the golden ticket in my onion rings!
I gained the freshman 58!
I know nothing about sports.
Cristela Alonzo likes watching the late night phone sex commercials on television.
Someone had to audition to be the "living under your toenail" guy.
The news is just a delivery system for commercials.
I probably should have dropped out of comedy that night at Rascals.
Rich recounts a horrible tour to Miami.
There's no such thing as a bad stand-up experience.