| Tess Videos | Tess Jokes |
Big girls have to stick together.
God did not intend for a woman to weigh 90 pounds.
Condoleezza Rice is a great liar.
Tess blames this "working craze" on the feminists.
Tess offers advice to her mentees at her church.
Tess is a rainbow coalition of dating.
Tess used to have a 56FF bra size.
Tess' parents are preoccupied with death.
God did not intend for a woman to weigh 90 pounds, alright? If
you do, you are in third grade. Me, personally, I think the only thing that should...
I was like, 'Shut up, Monica. Shut up. You messin' it up for
all the good, honest hos in the world.'
I never really wanted to work. I blame this whole working craze
on the feminists, that's who I blame it on. I don't know who put them in charge....
You're supposed to wait 'til you get married, get you a nice
little ring on your finger -- a nice rock, or a pebble if he cheap, but preferably a...
Big girls, we starting to get in style with the skinny girls,
too. We can wear thongs, now. I can wear a thong -- shoot, you may not be able to see...